You know how I whine about being in hell, and how I said I'm not on facebook, in my usual slightly snotty, somewhat superior tone? Well, now I'm really in hell. I can't even get on to the Internet, let alone onto facebook. Yep. My worst nightmare has come true. I'm offline.
We are having Weather. Not real weather, not tornados, thank God, not a hurricane, just a little wind, a little snow, some mildly freezing temperatures. It's not even worth writing about. But apparently, the wiring in my old apartment building is sensitive to temperature fluctuations. At least, that is what Craig, my supremo guru at my Internet service provider says. I have DSL. Apparently the wiring is so twitchy that I can sometimes get connected if I call my landline using my cell phone. Except that only worked twice, and now it's not working at all. Blink... Blink. That's the DSL light on my modem. A faint, feeble cry for help.
I'm sneaking time from work to update my blog. Not that anyone would know if I updated it or not, but my commitment to myself was to update it at least once a week. Because I'm at work, I don't have access to all my drawings, so this post will go unillustrated. (If I could illustrate it, though, the image would be one of me, wild-eyed, strangling one of my Access students for interrupting me every fifty-six seconds with inane comments: "I don't know where I left off." Like I keep track. "Where's the document tab? Oh.")
It's late. I'm whipped. I had my nap, but I'm still exhausted, and being disconnected from the Internet is not helping. Why is that? It's not like I can be home, online. And what would I be doing anyway? Checking my email. Writing this blog post. Nothing of consequence. Actually, if I were home right now, I'd be lying in a hot bath, reading some smutty vampire romance.
Why am I feeling so malcontented about not having Internet access? It is pathetic how attached I am to being connected, even if I am not home to use it. Even if I'm just doing banal tasks like checking email. I would rather my car break down. I would rather not have phone service. In fact, I'd gladly trade my landline for DSL service. How come my phone works but DSL doesn't? No idea.
I may be offline for a few days. The phone company has promised to visit me on Sunday, if you can believe it. I'm not sure I do, but that is what they said. So I'll be home, waiting. Twiddling my thumbs. Staring at my modem. Blink. Blink. Blink.
