Written, Illustrated, and Published at Smashwords by
Carol B. (AKA The Chronic Malcontent)
Pursuing a doctoral degree is not a trivial task. It's not for the faint of heart. Nor is it a project for quitters. Earning a Ph.D. is something only daft crazy people do. I mean, only a daft crazy person would spend eight years and upwards of $50,000 to gain the right to add a few extra letters after his or her name. Am I right? If it weren't a ridiculous, virtually impossible goal, everyone would have a Ph.D. You could buy half a dozen at the supermarket, in different languages. Everyone would be "Doctor." How fun!
What readers are saying about “Welcome to Dissertation Hell”
★★★★★ “Extreme introversion and malcontentedness never looked better.” (CJ)
★★★★★ “Someone please make this into a sitcom starring Kristin Schall or Kristen Wigg.” (CJ)
★★★★★ “Dr. Carol, I just finished your ebook about dissertation hell
and I sure can relate especially to the chair problem. I wasted a year at [his nameless online university] with an
unresponsive/lazy chair... I felt I was reading my
own story told by someone else. Your book is the first I have seen that was grounded in my
own reality and I wish that I had read this before comps and choosing a chair.
The information to me was a goldmine of lessons learned and what to expect
during the dissertation journey. I think
your book should be required reading. In one of my courses, we had to read "Graduate Savvy" by Jeff
Green which was more or less a handbook for online learners. Green's book was a bit pollyanna and shallow
when it came to post-classroom work; I would have preferred to read yours
instead. Maybe those gods at [another nameless online university] and
other schools would make your book required reading. Anyway, I enjoyed your work and so did my cat. Now to get over these post-dissertation
blues.” (Dr. Mark R.)
★★★★★ “Carol B. is a closet comic with a pen, the only writer I know who can make the Ph.D. road trip at all funny. Read it. Then go read her blog archive and demand more—with pitchforks and flaming torches, if needed.” (BS)
What non-readers are saying about "Welcome to Dissertation Hell"
★ “I worry about my daughter.” (MB, my mother)
As I mentioned, earning a doctorate is something only daft crazy people do. I was one of those daft crazies. At the end of 2005, in an effort to become more valuable to my then-employer (a for-profit career college), I enrolled at an online for-profit university. My plan was to earn a Ph.D. in Marketing, thereby transforming me into a highly educated (and highly desirable) instructor of marketing. I had no Master's degree, so I started at the bottom. Slowly, I began climbing toward my goal, taking one course at a time, for six years, culminating at the end of 2011 in the successful completion of the Comprehensive Exam.
To document my journey (and to keep from going insane), I started a blog in early 2012. I called it The Hellish Handbasket. Part diatribe, part memoir, The Hellish Handbasket blog has something for everyone, but is especially relevant for doctoral students.
What is this book about?
This ebook is a collection of blog posts from my blog, The Hellish Handbasket, documenting the final two years in my quest to complete the doctorate. The chronicle begins in January of 2012, after I had earned the title of A.B.D. (which means All But Dissertation, or alternatively, All But Dead). The chronicle concludes in early 2014with my victorious wresting of the doctoral degree from the cold dry claws of the university.
The posts are (I hope) humorous. My humor can be a bit dry. Probably it's an acquired taste. However, scattered throughout the ebook are hints, tips, and bits of advice for the aspiring doctoral learner. As an added bonus, many of the posts are illustrated with uniquely ridiculous pen-and-ink drawings culled from my years of journals and sketchbooks: Yes, I confess, the drawings are mine.
Whom is this book for?
The intended audience for this ebook (besides my long-suffering family and friends) consists of:
- Graduate students working toward a doctorate
- People who are considering enrolling in a graduate program to work toward a doctorate
- Friends and family of someone who is working toward a doctorate
- Recently matriculated Ph.D.s who want to relive their trauma and celebrate their well-earned accomplishments
What readers are saying about The Hellish Handbasket Blog
★★★★★ “I feel connected to you through your blog, which I find to be so funny - I venture onto it every couple weeks. I think you should sell t-shirts with your drawings on them. In fact I saw a Kickstarter the other day for the very same idea and this person raised $2,000 and honestly your work is so much better!!” (DW)
★★★★★ “Always love reading your posts. You must publish, Carol (and I'm not talking about the dissertation or academic articles). I'm sure your knowledge of marketing will help when you publish but you must publish. Otherwise, it's like a beautiful necklace sitting at the back of a drawer.” (BS)
★★★★★ “I love your blog!!!!!! You are a very funny insightful woman.” (RD)
To buy the ebook, visit https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/435082, which is the webpage where this fancy button is supposed to send you.
Welcome to Dissertation Hell is available through Smashwords on almost every e-reader platform that currently exists. Clicking the link will take you to a Smashwords shopping cart, where you can pay via PayPal or credit card. The retail price is $9.99. You can sample up to 20% of the ebook for free, to see if you like it. If you buy the ebook, I will get a portion of the proceeds.
