Back in the (teaching) saddle again: Yeehaw!

Last night I gave my first official presentation to a small crowd of Meetup junkies. We met in a back room at a Chinese restaurant, where in an earlier time I could picture stoic Chinese gangsters engaging in some serious cigar puffing, poker playing, and tea drinking, while tiny waitresses in traditional dresses scurried around refilling tea pots and serving egg noodle soup. The Chinese men were absent, but the tiny waitresses were a silent presence throughout the three-hour event. (Although they were dressed in plain white shirts and black pants.) At one point while I was speaking I noticed one waitress leaning against a wall near the entryway, arms folded, a skeptical look on her face.

The group was small, just seven people, plus the other presenter, the two organizers, and me. The space was cozy, maybe a little too cozy. We were packed in pretty tight around two tables, not much elbow room. A few of the attendees were close enough to touch. I didn't mind. After years of teaching, I don't mind standing close to my audience. When I'm that close, I can look my students in the eyes, alert for signs of discontent, boredom, or disagreement. There was a bit of an echo in the alcove, which added to the ambiance. As the evening progressed, the light from the overhead skylight glowed golden.

Some informal networking took place before the two 20-minute presentations began. I busied myself setting up my tiny Flip video camera (ancient technology) and my digital audio recorder (semi-ancient technology). I arranged my handouts, brochures, and a stack of business cards neatly on a table. This is a new Meetup group, so things were a little disorganized. Still, they remembered to bring name tags. Name tags are always a nice touch, especially when you forget to take it off after the event, and you wonder why people at the grocery store are suddenly calling you by name. I scribbled my name on a name tag and noticed that my hands were not shaking.

I wasn't nervous. (Well, maybe a little, since I discovered later I had failed to press the REC button on my audio recorder.) Maybe I should have been more nervous, I don't know. When I'm nervous, I try harder, I'm more animated, I tell more stupid jokes. Last night, I was feeling pretty mellow by the time the presentations actually started. I was up first. The organizer introduced me, stumbling over her words a bit as she tried to read my email on her little phone.

I stumbled over my own words, more than once, but I didn't care. I've fumbled and floundered in front of way larger audiences than this one. If you can survive forgetting your speech in front of 100 Toastmasters, you can survive anything. I wasn't afraid of looking foolish in front of seven Meetuppers! As the light grew dimmer, I had to lift my glasses a couple times to read my notes, but mostly I think I managed to stay on track, and was pleased to finish exactly on time. Always leave them wanting more. Or maybe it's more like, quit while you are ahead? I don't know.

Sometimes it is hard to tell what your audience is thinking. Have you noticed that? You babble on, you forge ahead, and you get increasingly uncomfortable as they stare at you intently. Are they understanding me, you wonder? Are they judging me? Do I sound like a ignoramus? Is there hair coming out of my nose?

An older gentleman dressed in a gray cotton shirt that matched his hair seemed to be riveted, but I couldn't tell from his facial expression and posture if he was receptive to my message or resistant. He sat about three feet from me; I could have reached out and smacked him with my notes if I wanted to provoke a response. Of course, I didn't. But I kept coming back to him, drilling him eye-to-eye, trying to figure him out.

Later we endured about an hour of serious networking, which ended up to be the best part for me. I found out the man in gray is a former newspaper publisher, a soon-to-be author, and a funny, friendly, very receptive and appreciative guy. Just goes to show, I guess. That you can't tell from the outside, bla bla bla, and also, that I'm not a very good judge of people. Who knew he would turn out to be so charming?

Overall, I had a good time. I judged my performance all the way home, but mostly I was relieved that it was over with so little drama or pain. Today I downloaded the video, intending to split the two segments apart so I could send the other presenter her portion of the video. In the course of figuring out how to do that, I watched my portion. Despite poor video quality, I have to say, I didn't do too badly. I'd give myself a B+.

Now I can move on to the next exciting event on the immediate horizon: my high school reunion. Once that is over, I think I'll take a day off. Summer is tiring.